My own white privilege

White privilege.
Many as you read those two words together will have emotions well up, likely ones that are not joyful, not full of love or understanding.
You will likely want to lash out, to dismiss such a notion in this land of opportunity we call America.
Go ahead. Feel it.
But I ask you also to then try and reflect differently,  once your choppy and angry waters calm.
Put aside all the years of pre-conceived assumptions, of ingrained beliefs, of yeah... prejudices.
Read the rest of this with a blank slate, with a clear mind, free of preconceptions. And when you read the stories, don’t let all those emotions overwhelm you, instead keep your mind in neutral.
Ready?

Derrick Mason, former NFL player,  grew up in a good environment, good income but was told by his father, whenever he drove anywhere to wear a lanyard around his neck. And in that lanyard, keep his license, his Proof of insurance and vehicle registration.   All in fear of not reaching for this information and being shot.

A friend - a middle-agree white - recently was in Detroit,  around 12:30 a.m. and was driving with several young black athletes, who he does financial advising for.     A cop pulled them over, and the first thing this young black man did upon pulling over, rolled down his window and showed his hands.
My friend - sitting in the back seat, said, “What the hell are you doing?”  The young black male said he always does this as a precaution.
My friend was stunned at the ugly and aggressive tone the police had with the young black male.
Soon, an officer tapped hard on the back window, when it rolled down and saw my white friend, again my white friend was stunned at how the tone changed.
The office said, ‘Oh you’re with them?  Ok, y’all slow down and go on.”

A co-worker was in Guatemala,  pre-marriage, and was out dancing, and asked a cute girl to dance.
Quickly, a friend jumped in and said, “What are you doing? We don’t dance with girls from that part of town!”

Recently I was discussing racism with a long-time best friend, and I made the comment how whites often can be racist.
Well, my friend, who’s Filipino, said I should say Caucasian, not white.  because many Filipinos - who are technically white - don’t want to be lumped into white category.

Stop.  Be still.  Think.  Feel.

This dear friend also had an amazing fact, one that lines up with the entire story that we are all children of God, from the same image, the same blood.
A history professor explained that we all came from an original man, very likely a dark-skinned ala Hebrew/Middle Eastern.   But as time passed, many of these peoples spread to other northern regions,  ones with less sun and less need for melanin, therefore becoming more.... yes, white.

And the greatest man in history, Jesus, very likely was dark skinned, and faced the ultimate discrimination and hatred, yet walked in love, in humility and forgiveness.

Even upon a cross, his skin and muscles literally falling off his bones from scourging, He looked past all the hatred, the divisiveness, the discrimination, the persecution,  and said, “Forgive them Father, for they know what they do.”

Well, as a white man with privilege, I need to feel my brother’s pain and fear.  In some ways, I am the Roman soldier, holding the flagrum.  I am the Pharisees, standing on my pedestal preaching my truths.
 I need to walk with more forgiveness and understanding.   I have not one iota of understanding of the systemic fear my fellow brothers of a different skin color have experienced. NONE.

My wise old-soul son, Kyle, profoundly said last night,
“If my brother hurts, I need to hurt with him.  If my brother rejoices, I will rejoice with him.”

Lord, I pray these words touched someone, gave them new eyes, new heart and more love.

And as I end this blog, this song comes on, lol, because God always shows up with His wisdom:

I’m learning to trust you, even when I can’t see it.
And even in suffering, I have to believe it.
If you say it’s wrong, then I’ll say no.
If you say release, I’m letting  go.
If you say be still, I will wait.
I’m done chasing feelings, Spirit lead me.
- Spirit Lead Me, Influence Music

The R word ... and my Reality

My heart hurts.

Not because of innocent people being maimed and killed by criminal thugs.

Not for the man kneeled into death by a criminal thug cop.

Not for the business owner who spent his life’s savings on opening a business, only to see it burned to the ground by evil anarchists.

No, my heart hurts because I’ve been blind.

My political leanings, my upper income status, my impatience with so much, and so many other personal roadblocks  have all blinded my heart to truly see each and every person as a human.

Though that human may do dastardly and evil acts, though that human may pander to a base they care nothing about, though that human may take advantage of social systems, I let my blinded heart not see that they too need God, they too need love and understanding.

My reality was sucker punched this past Sunday, listening to a message from TD Jakes.

I realized, yes, I do often look at a black man different through my white-person lenses,  instinctively judging, categorizing and yes... profiling.  

From my mouth, “I’m not racist.”  

From my heart, “yes you are” says God.

Today, thinking on all this, God whispered to me this thought:

I didn’t give my only Son as a living sacrifice for y’all to hate, to maim, to murder, to burn down.

I gave him to forgive us all and to love one another.

Friends, I for one, have not loved enough, I have not tried to understand enough, I have not sown peace and healing.  And all this was God’s truth in that sucker punch.

Racism. An incendiary subject. But one, truthfully we avoid, deny, hush. 

We live in vacuums of our own safety, teaching God’s grace but not the truth, Jakes said.

TD Jakes, an internationally renowned black pastor, in a recent interview said, “This isn’t about race. It’s about humanity. 

We need to love better, get out of our comfort zone and see that this is a human issue, he pleaded.  We need to speak up, and see the character of the heart , not the color of the skin.

And the painful truth - one that many whites - including me - want to silence and not believe is that there is systematic racism.  We must acknowledge this truth, and find out how we can fix it.

Carl Lenz, pastor of Hillsong East coast, said,  Yes, all lives matter, but you know what it’s also ok to say Black Lives matter!

And right now friends, whether justified here or not justified there, blacks as Jakes, said “we are bleeding.”     

We cannot discount their pain and their fear.

We must put aside our prejudices, show up, speak out, and prove we care about them, just like we care about any other human.   No matter your skin color, we must care about every human: white, black, brown.

In the end, we all want the same: to be heard, to be loved and to be treated fairly.

And friends, in the midst of this awful calamity, the lawless anarchist spreading fear,  and seemingly endless personal destruction, we -  especially the church, especially believers - at this moment in time have a chance to wipe away years of misconceptions, of hidden prejudices, and press reset.

To reset our minds, hearts and souls to really love one another.  

To see each and every human like God does:  as  a child to be loved.

I pray for forgiveness for my blinded past heart.  I pray that God continues to lift the scales from my eyes, and I see each human just like God does, and can love relentlessly just like my Father does.  And I pray all go to Jesus, to find the way to love more.

Peace, love and cheers to all humans!