Yep, good ol' Mister Microphone, y’all remember this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYEXBTlWf_4
Well, I"m thinking using this method because might be less painful and more effective than online dating!!!
Dang, at least with Mister Microphone, you were speaking to a I-can-see-you person, not photo-shopped/app enhanced gallery of pictures! (More on this later!)
I've navigated this odd cyber world now for off-and-on more than 7 years, and I desire nothing more than to
get off of it!
Match. com, Eharmony, Christian Mingle, POF, Tinder, Ourtime... Yep, I've tested many. Again, means to and end.
Friends Advice (all married and without a clue...)
Many friends have some delusional "man You're so lucky.. what I would do if I were single" dreamworld. they have ZERO clue.
I've had many tell me "Oh, get off those sites. Man, you're a good looking, good guy, just let it happen and meet someone
Yeah, sitting home, working and playing golf I come across a great selection of single women!
Or "Man, get off those sites. Just chill, and let them come to you!" another wonderful and woeful awful piece of advice.
Swimming in the Cesspool
One thing hasn't changed: I'm a pretty cool and normal fish swimming in a cesspool of creepers.
Creepers? Showing their junk, bare chested, endless texts/stalking... yeah, only few of stories I've been told.
So the challenge becomes how to poke your head up and show you're not one of these creeper rejects!
The One-Offs
If I were to guess how many 1st-only dates - what I call one-offs - I'd peg over/under at 100 lol.
Not kidding. And 95%+ time, I pick up the bill(s). So, we're talking mucho moolah.
I've pondered how do I reduce the number of one-offs. It's a question worthy of Socrates or Einstein.
My vast experimenting has deducted a few methods, none proven to be 100% successful:
- asking what exactly they want, and what they like
- Facebook stalking (actually as I've progressed in this game, the most effective!)
- trying to determine why they're now single
Selection time: Lessons learned
Head shot only
Met one woman who had multiple head shot poses, all from side angles.
We texted and seemed to have some initial chemistry.
Well, when she showed up (30 minutes late...strike one), immediately it was apparent she wasn't "average build," as she was built like a middle LB (strike 2)
She sat, I bought her a drink, and ... whoa.... now the head-shot only reason! Not to be ugly, but I didn't know which eye to look into: as she was severely cock-eyed. (Strike 3: it was a short date, and no 2nd date)
- asking what exactly they want, and what they like
- Facebook stalking (actually as I've progressed in this game, the most effective!)
- trying to determine why they're now single
Selection time: Lessons learned
Sure warning signs on their online profiles:
Laying in bed selfie
Sexy is cool, but bed selfies, nah that's trying just a little too much.
Sexy is cool, but bed selfies, nah that's trying just a little too much.
The Magical Apps:
The use of apps to wash out blemishes, create fake eyes, etc... yeah, it's a thing. And a sure warning sign.
Also, what's up with the apps that add bunny ears, mouse noses, et al?
Head shot only
Met one woman who had multiple head shot poses, all from side angles.
We texted and seemed to have some initial chemistry.
Well, when she showed up (30 minutes late...strike one), immediately it was apparent she wasn't "average build," as she was built like a middle LB (strike 2)
She sat, I bought her a drink, and ... whoa.... now the head-shot only reason! Not to be ugly, but I didn't know which eye to look into: as she was severely cock-eyed. (Strike 3: it was a short date, and no 2nd date)
Bait n switch!
Many have group only, pics, only w other women. You literally don't know who's profile it is! LOL
Many have group only, pics, only w other women. You literally don't know who's profile it is! LOL
Photoshopped
Early in my adventure, I connected with who appeared to be a very attractive Brazilian woman.
We met Uptown for early diner. Well, it was obvious from jump, ALL of her pictures were photoshopped. Add to this, she basically fudged and failed to disclose she was an unemployed actress.
Early in my adventure, I connected with who appeared to be a very attractive Brazilian woman.
We met Uptown for early diner. Well, it was obvious from jump, ALL of her pictures were photoshopped. Add to this, she basically fudged and failed to disclose she was an unemployed actress.
Glamour shots
Yeah, 1980s Glamour Shots don't really do it.
Selfies with animals
Ok, look, I love animals. But I'd say profile pics with dogs (or just pics of dogs...) doesn't show you're really on the hunt for a relationship. Especially if the selfie is you and .. wait for it....a hamster.
Yeah, 1980s Glamour Shots don't really do it.
Selfies with animals
Ok, look, I love animals. But I'd say profile pics with dogs (or just pics of dogs...) doesn't show you're really on the hunt for a relationship. Especially if the selfie is you and .. wait for it....a hamster.
Pics with dog licking and kissing you on the lips… ummmm, wow, big no.
User name "sexxy" or "hotty "
Ummmm, nope.
Ummmm, nope.
Sticking tongue out
Never quite got the tongue wagging selfies
Bootylicious
I've never dated a woman of color. But apparently from the hundreds of shots from behind (often self taken via mirrors) of their bubble butt booties sticking out is a thing.
Never quite got the tongue wagging selfies
Bootylicious
I've never dated a woman of color. But apparently from the hundreds of shots from behind (often self taken via mirrors) of their bubble butt booties sticking out is a thing.
Profile is pic of a picture
Ummmm, can you say "selfie"?
It's really a not-so great adventure, one that I wouldn't really wish upon any of my friends.
Ummmm, can you say "selfie"?
It's really a not-so great adventure, one that I wouldn't really wish upon any of my friends.
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